Que Sara Sara

Looking back there are many signs that I am autistic, yet no one picked up on it. Well, I was born female (strike 1), I was born in the late 70s (strike 2), to my family, what I did was fairly normal as my whole family is neurodivergent, most of us multi. Here are ones I can remember:

* Sleeping oddly (on front with butt up in the air)

* Learning to read very early (hyperlexic) and starting to read Laura Ingalls Wilder series when I was 4.

* Hand flapping when excited or in pain

* Rubbing the silk ribbon around my baby blanket until it fell off (rub with fingers, on cheeks, on lips, etc.). They put a new one on 3-4×.

* Being very sensitive to touch and temperature.

* Being very sensitive to sounds, tastes, textures.

* Taking things literally. I remember going to a summer day camp and they told the Bloody Mary horror story. I was so terrified that I thought if I even thought her name she would come get me. Kept a towel over my mirror for 3 years.

* Loving sensory tables at school. My favorite was the one filled with dry rice. I loved the sound, feel, and smell.

* Rubbing my hair on my lips and chewing on it.

* listening to Rocking Around the Christmas Tree on a record and dancing for hours.

*Stim dancing in my room for hours.

* Lining up my toys in rows and categories.

* Doing math problems “wrong” when I showed my work, but getting the answer right.

* Always feeling like I was in a clear bubble just outside my own social circles, never really fitting in.

* Having 2 really close friends, and the rest acquaintances.

* Find a lot of “friends” that were wrong for me.

* Pebbling with friends and people I wanted to like me. I really still give too much of myself and get nothing back. Sometimes it feels nice, sometimes it feels rotten.

* Hyperfocusing on something and working for days, months, years, and then dropping it (some of that us ADHD). I, for ex., watched the Rosie ODonnell show way back. She started doing the collages with modge podge. Omg…obsessed for years. I pulled magazines apart for colors, words, pictures, etc. Everything was organized very well. I finally threw 95% of it away years ago. It was an obsession. It interfered with my life and finances.

* Computer games like The Sims (I had more fun building houses), Sim City, Zoo Tycoon, etc. I would play these for hours and hours.

* Drawing “blueprints” for houses in classes in high school on notebook paper. Loved it. (Before The Sims original came out.)

* Having a fictional story idea, writing it, hyperfixating on researching for it, and never finishing.

* Tags in clothing

* Scratchy clothes.

* Not wanting to go to school anymore once I hit 1st grade because I was an outcast on the playground most of the time.

I’m sure there are more, but that will do for now. I can always add more later.