Que Sara Sara

As I work in education with students with disabilities, I often work for 5 weeks of the summer. Last summer was absolutely Hell. I had one week between the regular year ending and the summer program starting to put together a summer resource room for lower elementary students, many with behaviors. I had no access…

Medication, for those that are on it, can be a life long struggle to keep balanced. I seem to have a high tolerance, I guess, to some meds because it isn’t long before I have cycled through that current level and my wheel begins to wobble. I need to increase the dose to balance out…

I take, currently, Buspirone for anxiety/depression. I can take it up to 3x a day. I started taking it in the morning. However, it effects my Adderall in my body in a very weird way. I feel heavy, foggy, numb, yet alert. It’s like I can pay attention, easily, to two things at once, but…

I’m drowning in my depression It keeps pulling me under Choking, coughing, sputtering I’m barely treading water anymore I’m getting so tired I’ve tossed out my life ring How long before I get to use it? A few days? A week? 7 weeks I can’t wait 7 weeks. I’ll have drowned by then…

I’m sorry that I exist. I’m sorry that I speak. I’m sorry I always do the wrong things. I’m sorry I breathe. I’m sorry you gave birth to such a burden and disappointment. I’m sorry that I exist too.

So, it is in times like this week that I can tell I don’t have the right coping skills to cope with things in life. I have n0o one to teach me. I had a therapist, but I left them in early November 2021 because they didn’t understand autism at all and just let me…

My day was pretty good, but I think my fuse was shorter today than yesterday. Nothing really went wrong at work. I think I was just out of spoons when I left. Then traffic was horrible and so that made me agitated. Then the dishes were going so I couldn’t use the specific pan I…

Hello, my name is Sara. I’m a 43yo queer person. I was diagnosed ADHD and dyscalculia at 41 and autistic at 42. I am also undiagnosed EDS (I have a lot of markers, but can’t pass the test. More on that in later post). Why was i diagnosed so late?! I wouldn’t have been diagnosed…